PC Bourne
Number of missions | 6 (Mission 10 10 Zürich, Mission 11 11 Gdańsk, Mission 12 12 Helsinki, Mission 14 14 Hanover, Mission 15 15 Geneva, Mission 26 21 26 Garmisch-Partenkirchen) |
Missions commanded | 0 |
Draw privilege | P.C. Bourne's mentalist round |
Gets a destination | always |
Destinations selected | 28 Vienna, 17 36 Porto, 14 Hanover, Halifax (Nova Scotia), Québec City, Fiji, Manaus, 19 Miami, 40 Douglas, 3 Stockholm, Flores, Marrakesh, 13 25 Reykjavík, Kyoto, Cabo San Lucas, 15 Geneva, Turin, Manila, Beirut, Nagasaki, 30 Bergen, 17 36 Porto, 35 Alice Springs, Santa Fe) |
Average finishing position in draws | 6.36 (--,--,--,--,--,--,--,--,--,--,4,7,1,8(S),--,9(S),7,--,9,7(S),10(B),7,--,1,--,7,7,--,5,1,4) |
Best finish in a draw | 1st (Mission 13 13 25 Reykjavík,Mission 24 24 Arnhem) and Mission 34 34 Skipton |
Worst finish in a draw | 10th (Mission 21 21 Budapest, when bummed and Mission 32 32 Rome, when shafted) |
Preceding mascot | Barney |
Following mascot | Hel 2006 |
P.C. Bourne joined the Colonel's regiment on Mission 10 10 Zürich. He was found languishing on a market stall with a group of similar looking characters and having no recollection of his real identity. The only clue was a micro chip embedded in his arm and carrying the number of a Swiss bank account. However, on visiting the bank, it appeared that the safety deposit box to which the number referred had already been cleared out by a man who resembled the actor Matt Damon. P.C. Bourne is still searching for his true identity and has pledged his future to the Colonel until such time as his identity is revealed.
P.C. Bourne has an unaccountable affinity for trams.
P.C. Bourne's mentalist round
This was added to the draw in Mission 11 11 Gdańsk. As P.C. Bourne is struggling to find his true identity, he is entitled to steal one identity on each break. To do this, the Colonel's regiment must each declare a destination of their choice at the first night meal, which gets added to a list. This list must then be carried around with them for the following two days, until a mentalist of quality is found. Once a mentalist has been discovered, the Colonel's Regiment must make contact with the mentalist and ask him or her to select a destination from their list. P.C. Bourne then steals the identity of this mentalist and adds their choice of destination to the draw as his own choice.
Interaction with Gløgg
If Gløgg bums P.C. Bourne, he loses his destination.
If P.C. Bourne is helped, he steals another identity. He therefore duplicates a destination put in by any of the Colonel's Regiment or by any of the mascots who hold a destination (decided at random). This becomes "Gløgg's choice".
Results
Mission | Mentalist consulted | P.C. Bourne's choice | Position |
---|---|---|---|
Mission 11 11 Gdańsk | Andrzej the Pirate | 28 Vienna | 4th |
Mission 12 12 Helsinki | Waitress Ploppy | 17 36 Porto | 7th |
Mission 13 13 25 Reykjavík | Steve, Geordie mentalist | 14 Hanover | 1st |
Mission 14 14 Hanover | Historian Bus Driver | Halifax (Nova Scotia) | 8th (shafted) |
Mission 15 15 Geneva | Stammtisch waitress mentalist | Québec City | N/A (in hell) |
Mission 16 16 Athens | Brent Shannaman | Fiji | 9th (shafted) |
Mission 17 17 36 Porto | Aveiro Waiter | Manaus | 7th |
Mission 18 18 Berlin | Juan, waiter from Gran Canaria | 19 Miami | N/A (in hell) |
Mission 19 19 Valletta | Tour Guide at St Agatha's Church, Rabat | 40 Douglas | 9th |
Mission 20 20 Bruges | Barman at 't Poatersgat | 3 Stockholm | 7th (shafted) |
Mission 21 21 Budapest | Strange busker on palace walls | Montepulciano | 10th (bummed) |
Mission 22 22 Lisbon | Shavo in Bar do Ricardo | Flores | 7th |
Mission 23 23 Copenhagen | Barman in Brewery who loved Marrakesh | Marrakesh | N/A (in hell) |
Mission 24 24 Arnhem | Dutch John de Mello | 13 25 Reykjavík | 1st |
Mission 25 25 Ghent | Belgian Reg Holdsworth | Kyoto | N/A (in hell) |
Mission 26 21 26 Garmisch-Partenkirchen | Waiter at Drei Mohren | Cabo San Lucas | 7th |
Mission 27 27 Sofia | Angel from Dragalevtsi | 15 Geneva | 7th |
Mission 28 28 Vienna | Vienna symphony orchestra ticket vendor (and his friends) | Turin | N/A (in hell) |
Mission 29 29 Luxembourg (City) | Useless waiter at El Companero | Manila | 9th |
Mission 30 30 Bergen | Norwegian Tom Lindstrom at Pingvinen | Beirut | 9th |
Mission 31 31 Kraków | Evelyn the tour guide at the salt mines | Nagasaki | 7th |
Mission 32 32 Rome | A comedic gelati vendor in Anzio | 30 Bergen | 10th (shafted) |
Mission 33 33 Bayeux | The owner of Le Conquerant | 17 36 Porto | 5th |
Mission 34 34 Skipton | Tom (via Whatsapp video call) | 35 Alice Springs | 1st |
Mission 35 35 Kendal | Cumbrian Brian Glover | Santa Fe | 4th |
Mission 36 36 Rye | Terry “Dave” Gilliam (owner of Waterworks) | Cabo San Lucas | N/A (in hell) |
The mentalist lists for each mission have been created as such:
It should be noted that all "mentalists" consulted are not actually mentalists - in the main they are nice people whom the Colonel's Regiment have had enormous pleasure to meet and spend (brief) quality time with on each break. The only genuine mentalist consulted thus far was Steve the Geordie mentalist during Mission 13 13 25 Reykjavík.
Please choose!
Language | Source (native speaker?) | Please choose! |
---|---|---|
Polish | 11 Gdańsk (no) | Proszę wybierać |
Portuguese | 22 Lisbon (yes) | Por favor escolha un destino para nós |